Bridesmaids

Introducing Our New Guest Blogger (& Tips For Choosing Your Bridesmaids)!

Julia Smith

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Rachel Parry Mosaic Brides.

I’m excited to announce to new addition of a regular guest blogger here at Brides Up North – and this isn’t just any other random guest blogger – this girl comes with some pretty brilliant Northern bridal industry credentials.

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A huge and hearty welcome to Rachel Parry, the newest member of our growing team (ahem), here at Brides Up North HQ, and none other than editor of Mosaic Brides Magazine, an influential industry publication in Yorkshire. 

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In her first post for her favourite wedding blog (*blush*) she tackles a tricky topic for any leading lady – choosing your supporting cast – your bridesmaids.  Over to you, Rachel. 

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With black & white images by Katy Melling Photography

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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Rachel says: So the ring is firmly on the finger and you can’t wait to tell your friends and family.

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After cooing over the ring female attention soon turns towards questions about bridesmaids.  So who’s it going to be? Mums and aunties may well have already formed an opinion on this years ago, but ultimately the decision is down to the bride and it’s not one that should be rushed.

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It’s important to bear in mind from the offset that bridesmaids are there to make the planning process and the big day itself less stressful and more enjoyable – they should lessen the tension, not add to it.

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Winning attributes include those who are supportive of you and your relationship as well as being honest, trustworthy, responsible, organised and loving.

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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How Many?

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Where to draw the line? According to tradition the amount of bridesmaids should be proportionate to the size of the guest list in order to help things run smoothly on the day.

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While it’s important to remember that bridesmaids can be a great help in the run up to and during the wedding, there’s no point recruiting excessive numbers.  In many ways having too many bridesmaids can heighten stress levels rather than reduce them. For example more bridesmaids mean more cost on things like presents, dresses and accessories. It also means more people to organise and please when it comes to picking the bridesmaid dresses and arranging the fittings.

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Really what it should come down to is who you want closet to you on the journey towards and during your wedding day – whether that be just one person or a great big group.

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography    Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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Who?

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Probably the hardest part. Opinions are often divided at this point as whether to pick friends, family or a mixture of the two.  Some would undoubtedly argue that blood is thicker than water and therefore it should be family before friends but not all families are close and it could make both the bride and family bridesmaid feel uncomfortable.

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On the flip side friends can come and go, so as difficult as it is hold back from impromptu proposals and wait until closer the time when you can pick those nearest and dearest.

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When making your decision take time to think about who would suit the role, who knows you best, who has time to fulfil the role and would feel honoured to do so.  You shouldn’t have to explain your choices to anyone but by considering the above it shows you have thought hard about your decision rather than just picking those who will look good in a pretty dress.

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And remember, being a bridesmaid is an honour, not a right, so don’t feel pressured to ‘repay the compliment’ by purely asking someone to be your bridesmaid because you did it for them.

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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What?

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In order to avoid a competitive scene from the film Bridesmaids it’s important to make your maids feel equally important and involved.

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The usual bridesmaid duties might include:

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Helping to pick/organise things for the day

Advising on the wedding dress/bridesmaid dresses and attending fittings

Helping to make things for the wedding

Organising the hen do

Helping you get ready on the day

Doing a reading/making a speech

Working with the ushers/best man to organise guests and photos

Making sure you have everything you need throughout the day and ensuring things go smoothly.

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Remember though, these are friends – not slaves (and you want them to still be your friends at the end of the process!). 

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Bridesmaids by Katy Melling Photography

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The maid of honour/chief bridesmaid is generally a position allocated to the person who knows you inside out and will therefore take on board your feelings and wishes.  This person should also relieve some of the stress resting on your shoulders by overseeing the other bridesmaids, making organisational skills a bonus.   Above all the maid of honour should know how to keep you calm and make you smile.

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Much love, Rachel x

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To see all the beautiful images from Mr and Mrs Luke’s Real Wedding click here. 

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  – Images © 2012 Katy Melling Photography 

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