Photography by Kate Scott
The guest list – perhaps the most stressful and contentious element of organising a wedding as brides, grooms and their families battle it out for who should make the cut.
Initially the budget must be taken into account; for the standard of wedding that is desired, realistically how many guests will it cover? Then there’s finding a suitable venue that caters for the right numbers. Oh and don’t forget the ‘whether-or-not-to-invite-children’ argument, and the plus-one showdown. It really is tricky!
Then, just when you thought you had it sussed – boom, there’s the added confusion of whether to invite
evening-only guests
*begins to hit head against brick wall*.But fear not, the big debate is here to help once again as today we take look at the pros and cons on both sides of the evening guest issue. Either way, if their name ‘aint down, they ‘aint coming in!
Photography by Paul Liddement
rachel says be my guest…
Ok, so one element of my (fictional) wedding that I want to be a-maz-ing is the evening reception, and in order for it to be that, I will need my fantastic friends as well as my dear family, all around me. This, therefore, makes me inclined to hold some guests off until the real party gets underway at night.
Not only can this option save money (fewer mouths to feed at the wedding breakfast), but it also breathes new life into the celebrations when the mood my start to falter after a few too many sauvignons and trips to the sweetie table.
Yes, some will argue that it can cause awkward pauses or clashes in the day if the meal runs over or evening guests arrive early, but the way I see it, it gives the bride and groom ‘quality time’ with their nearest and dearest for the ceremony and daytime proceedings, while also giving them another highlight to look forward to later on.
As evening guests aren’t as pricey as full-time guests, it might also allow a few extras to make the party-list, such as work colleagues, which some wedding couples can struggle to place into their plans.
Overall it’s all about looking at the budget and deciding what’s important, fewer guests there all day to enjoy the proceedings with a strictly no-evening-guests-allowed policy, or having a larger guest list overall with those invited split into all-day and reception-only camps. Either way in my book it’s imperative that there are enough energetic, up-for-it guests to keep the dancefloor full all night long!
Photography by Lisa Hindle
julia says vip access only…
So, you just got an invitation to a friend’s evening do. Nice, right? Or is it?
Nice in that they like you enough to want to have you as part of their wedding day, or not so nice that they didn’t like you enough to include you in the full thing? Suddenly that evening reception invitation can seem a little like a kick in the teeth.
Ok, ok, I get it… I’m being extremely dramatic, and restrictions on numbers at your venue of choice and often overall budget mean that an evening reception is sometimes the only way that you can make it work and include your extended friendship group. But, there can be another way.
Instead of trying to pack everyone into the constraints of your budget and the four walls of a limited space, I’d ask you to consider ditching the idea of the evening do all together (as in the evening only guests, not the party!) and just having an altogether smaller wedding, cutting back the numbers to simply your closest friends and family.
Wouldn’t it be brilliant to use your available funds to really treat those that you love and draw them around you for a full and interrupted wedding day? There’s something lovely about gathering everyone together for an intimate ceremony and then spending time celebrating with just that group of special individuals – feasting and toasting without time constraints or upsetting the vibe of the day.
When you have guests arriving for an evening celebration, suddenly the timeline of your day becomes more of an issue than it needs to be. Are you sitting down for dinner on time? Do you need to cut the speeches short? Will you be keeping everyone waiting?
The arrival of additional numbers – whether those be part of your wider friendship group or work colleagues – inevitably means that your attention will be diluted as you focus on your new arrivals. Whilst it’s obviously lovely to share your day and pick up the party tempo at night time, don’t you really want to be celebrating with those important enough to be allocated a seat at the ceremony? Oh, and your new husband. Remember him?
At the end of the day, I’m all for a big party, but I wanted to point out that there is always another option to the status quo. Keeping proceedings small, simple and select doesn’t always have to be second best.
image source, Photography by Jillian Bowes
what you said on facebook…
Annabel says: “We’ll be keeping our wedding small and limited to our closest friends, I think it’s nicer that way.”
Jeanette says: “I’m really excited about our evening do – it switches things up for the night time part of that day. Bring on the party!”
Michelle says: “Our venue restrictions means that inviting some people for the evening party was really our only option if we didn’t want to leave key people out.”
