It’s long been the tradition for a bride mark her passage into married life with a right royal knees-up surrounded by her leading ladies. But what if a bride wants a pre-wedding celebration with her guy pals too? Behold
the hag do
– an amalgamation of a hen and stag party during which both the bride and groom-to-be party with their nearest and dearest, no matter their gender. And no, this isn’t an April fool… this is a thing.So today we’re discussing if it’s time to bury yet another classic wedding ritual with this new, modern approach or whether us girls should stick together for a sisterly send-off?
rachel says: here come the girls
I’m not a stickler for tradition but when it comes to the ‘last night of freedom’ for a bride, I believe it should be a girl-only zone. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting for one minute that a bride should be looking to cop-off on her hen do, but she should be able to fully let her hair down and enjoy without being under the watchful eye of her soon-to-be hubby, his friends or his family.
I can’t even begin to imagine how my boyfriend and I would come up with a guest list for a joint send-off, never mind a list of activities. Perhaps with our friends, but are parents, aunties, uncles etc. included too? As much as I enjoy socialising with my mum and dad and the in-laws, I’m not sure how I’d feel about them joining in with a Jäger bomb train in a city centre bar.
Meanwhile if the parents/older relatives aren’t invited, I’d worry that combining the celebrations would just feel like any other weekend out with friends?
So in this instance I’m saying allow the girls to have fun and stick with a hen do as we know it. That way a bride can fully indulge in her pre-wedding celebrations with the attention fully on her and doing all the things she wants to do; whether it be on a relaxing spa weekend, taking mini-break abroad or having a classic night out on the town, complete with ‘L’ plates and Diet Coke style strippers. Remember, what happens on the hen, stays on the hen!
julia says: all together now
Whilst I love my girly friends, I’m one of those (sometimes probably quite annoying) girls who just loves a bit of male company too. Sex doesn’t come into it at all – I flirt with pretty much everyone, girls included! – I just like the easy company of blokes. I like their chat, their lack of agenda and their drinking abilities. As a result, I have a lot of really good guy friends.
Its important that I reiterate here that its never been about the lovin’. Its always been platonic – and now my male friends *waves! did I catch you reading a wedding blog?* are great friends with my husband too.
When it came to my own wedding back in 2010 I went down the traditional hen do route – me and my best gals headed off to Edinburgh for far too much Champagne and to carefully craft week long hangovers. It was epic. However, if I was planning my wedding now, I would really like my final send off to be one with all of my best mates involved.
A “hag do” – where hen and stag dos are combined with the bride and groom partying alongside each other – would have been really quite appealing to me. One big raucous celebration with all my faves in one place, including my hubby to be. The bubbles, banter and dancing on the tables would have all been included, with a hangover soothing cuddle from my other half thrown in as part of the package.
It also means that you might escape some of the more tedious traditional “hen safe” activities… honestly, does anyone really enjoy knicker crafting, cheer-leading or starring in your own music video whilst slightly worse for wear after a too heavy first night of the weekend?
Of course, its not for everyone, but if you truly share a friendship group this might be one tradition-bending idea that’s both kind on the pocket (combining two parties into one) and fun for everyone involved.
image source, photography by Braedon Photography
what you said on facebook
Lisa says: “I’m really close to my brothers and my partner is having a ‘best woman’ instead of a ‘best man’ at the wedding so it made complete sense for us to have a hag do.”
Anna says: “Definitely sticking with the girls. I’m planning a spa trip, shopping, cocktail-making class and cupcake decorating as part of my celebrations – can’t imagine my husband-to-be wanting to do the same!”
Abbi says: “As we are in a group of friends which comprises of couples, we’re having our own hen/stag dos and then also planning a pre-wedding night out with our close couple friends too – didn’t know it was called a hag do!”
